Louisiana Man on Meth Claims SpongeBob Stole His Paperwork

A man in north Louisiana has been charged with disturbing the peace after he was found wandering down a street and screaming profanities.

Wait, it gets better.

The Ouachita Parish Sheriff's Office responded to a call on Sunday that 27-year-old Jonathan Porter was intoxicated and creating a public disturbance.

Deputies had some interesting notes in their arrest warrants for young Mr. Porter. They wrote that Porter told them the cartoon character SpongeBob SquarePants had stolen his paperwork and that "God has battleships but hasn't sent them yet."

Oh, and the arrest warrant also mentioned that deputies noticed a white substance near Porter's mouth and found meth and a narcotic pain reliever in his pockets.

He was charged with resisting an officer and possession of a controlled dangerous substance.